SHUT UPPP

I have a verrry friendly group of friends. We have our enemies, sure (I'm looking at you, GTYO), but for the most part we're pretty easy to get along with. This includes when we go out as a group. For every three people we piss off, there's usually at least one who thinks we're cool. Sometimes, they even want to be friends. And occasionally, they provide us with WAY too much information.

So today was Mary's birthday (HAPPY BIRTHDAY MISS MARY!) so we went to Trudy's to celebrate, but it turned out to be kind of a rip off because you can't get your free birthday drink on Top Shelf Tuesday. So pretty much every seven-ish years your birthday will fall on a Tuesday, and you will get the shaft from Trudy's. WTF is that all about? At least make that common knowledge so that if you're gonna go get tanked on a birthday that falls on a Tuesday you'll wander into one of the other bajillion awesome places in Austin and drink for free because let's face it, I can pay for a Mexican Martini any night of the year. But we were nice about it because they were nice when our "table for eight" turned in to "we're gonna push these two GIANT tables together because Mary is so awesome that a thousand people want to celebrate her birthday with us!" so whatever.

No, the real WTF moment came when the host seated a girl in the table behind us. She had a margarita and chips and queso, and was just hanging out by herself, talking to the waitress occasionally. It was a pretty big table and she was all alone so I just assumed that she was waiting on people, until suddenly she jumped up with her phone in her hand and walked out of the restaurant. Of course I'm gossipy so I had to point it out to Katie, who then suggested we steal her abandoned margarita. To be fair, none of us were thinking particularly straight at that point because it was the verrry end of Happy Hour, and stealing a stranger's lonely, melting strawberry 'rita and delicious queso didn't sound like a bad idea. Then for reasons totally unrelated, Katie mentioned the odd behavior to our waitress, who replied, and I quote:

"Oh yeah, that's my friend. She'll be back, she got a phone call that said her grandpa was on his way to her house and she realized she'd left her bong on top of the refrigerator."

HUH? I get that we're cool and we should be friends and all that, but this is a lot of information to dispel to a giant table of strangers, three of whom are currently employed as drug and alcohol counselors. Plus on top of your 'fridge seems to be a really weird place to put your bong, but what would I know about it? And would your grandpa even know what a bong was? IDK - it was just a totally random and hilarious and weird thing to say to people. Weirdos.