Questions I'm Tired Of Answering At Work...

6:23 PM Posted In , , Edit This 0 Comments »
- YES, we get a lot of bridezillas. Yes, they're that bad, and yes, brides from our store have been on the TV show before.

- NO, you can't give me ten style numbers and have me pull the dresses and put them in a fitting room because you'll be "in a hurry" at your appointment.

- NO, I can't hold a dress until Tuesday so you can come try it on.

- NO, alterations are not included in the cost of the dress.
ALSO: Yes, you have to pay in full with your first fitting. You don't go to a restaurant and then act surprised when they want you to pay, right?
AND: It's "alterations" not "alter-nations", and your dress is being "altered" not "alterated", "alternated", or any other twisted variety of that word.

- YES, all sales really are final. It's printed on a sign by each register, your receipt (which you signed), and on the garment tags. Even with your receipt, even with the tags on, even if you ordered it and never picked it up, all sales are final. Please choose carefully.
ALSO: No you can't exchange it.

- YES, without an appointment you might have to go on the waiting list, which could take an hour or longer before we can get you into a fitting room.
ALSO: No, I'm not lying to you, all of our fitting rooms really are assigned to consultants on the weekends.
IMPORTANT: This isn't a Target, things work a little differently here.

ALSO, A NOTE FOR GUYS: I'm sure you're convinced that it's incredibly clever and hilarious when you walk in the door and I ask how we can help you to say "I'm looking for a wedding dress..." just to see what happens. Fun fact: You're not the first guy this week to make that "joke". You're probably not even the first guy TODAY to make that joke. Want to know what would be really damn charming? To just say "I'm looking for my wife and kids." Because I know that's what you're probably doing, I just want to make sure. And also I'm testing you. Because if you were REALLY funny and clever, you would put your money where your mouth is and wear a freakin wedding dress for half an hour. And then we'd be friends and I'd respect you, because that's cooler than making a lame joke because you're uncomfortable walking in to a bridal shop. Are we on the same page? Next time just go to Best Buy, it's like, RIGHT THERE.